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rhythm & bluesAngry M.F. Fisher gives it to ya’ll riggy diggy raw: Sometimes it’s just too easy, which doesn’t mean it ain’t still fun. Smith Street between 1st Place & Schemerhorn? Hardly any fun, at least since it turned into just about the most loathsome dogshit “shopping district” in Brooklyn history. Looking at my coochie it’s about that time (to get back to Gravesend) but there are some exceptions here, & competitors too. Competition? Oh, you know like all the really “creative types” with stores on Motherfucking Smith Street & whatever block of Park Slope you hate the most today: depends who’s asking, I guess. What kind of dog? Probably not a pug! They are a very rare breed in 21st Century “Brownstone” Brooklyn where people express their individuality in all ways, all the time. Ah, I see Angry, but what about your hair– c’est fantastique! What does a “creative,” “upscale” New Brooklynite do from one brunch to the other? I assume even an Angry Food Writer can’t stay jiggy via wine bars, yoga, chain stores & “indie” rock jukeboxes alone. No, you’re right– I can’t… How many people out here in Blogville (Pop. 1280) remember Tabouleh on Smith St? It wasn’t great like the Yemenis on & around Atlantic still are but hey! They weren’t from Yemen either. In fact, the owner was Jordanian; the best cook I knew, an Egyptian dude. They didn’t get much attention; the press then– let’s call it 1998-2001 or so– was bent on hyping jive bistro shit, just like today, although there were still more than a few Spanish joints then too, of all kinds. What kind? Well OK, not Mexican– those hermanos “only” work here & cook your “French” or “New American Fusion” slop but there’s awesome Mexican food in many parts of the BK… just not this one. Hint: hardly any immigration, except a few ex-pat types & most of them don’t know the glories 150 Years of South Brooklyn hath wrought either. One who does get it– or is trying to– is Citizen Katia, who alone among the local blogidad noted the sad demise of Kendel’s Bsweet talk dirty talkeauty & Barber Shop, 112 Smith St. We’re not sure but we think she’s a foreigner so maybe she doesn’t know that– shhhhh– “we” ain’t supposed to talk about black folks, unless they have a West Indian lilt & are raising our kids. As for the good white people of Cobble & Boerum Hill– even nearby Gowanus (look Mizz Fisher, we’re slumming!), a spokesperson for the group declined comment.

Scorpion, Vice-Chair of the Plunder’s Neck Family Coalition wonders: But what of our new assclown Governor, he of the busted peepers, a wandering eye & also a curiously ah…– how you say?– variable position on Eminent Domain? Norm Oder jumped into the fray here. Peter Kieffer of the New York Sun– which, to its credit, opposes Eminent Domain abuse– went longer in this March 14 piece. The kicker comes at the end– presumably David Paterson does then too, hard:

The president of the Real Estate Board of New York, Steven Spinola, said he was not very concerned about the issue, and that other pressing needs such as resolving the state budget would dominate the agenda for now. “It would clearly be a mistake for the state to give up one of its powers to get public improvement projects off the ground,” said Mr. Spinola.

Translation: nobody is worried because they know Paterson plays ball; a whore like the rest.

From the grounds of old Washington Park, Zincsmith Billiard: Handball, cricket, hoops, bike racing, track & field, fishing, volleyball, surfing– even tennis in Fort Greene & out at Coney Island, we’ve got the streets and the beach on smash. While I had rooting interests in both Ghana & Trinidad during the 2006 World Cup, we mostly leave soccer to others. As for the Baseball Furies, on the grave of Gil Hodges himself, The Publisher is a sworn enemy. Neil deMause of deMause.net & the Village Voice has a higher calling to give it to us riggy diggy raw regardless. First, I l-o-v-e love like Al Green is… that deMause busts on “architecturally challenged” sportswriters who don’t know the difference betwen scrim & a “façade.” Second, predictable as it was, WWIB yet deplores the following:

What you won’t see are a lot of public parks being built. The largest of the planned replacements, dubbed “Heritage Field,” won’t be ready for another three years—the current stadium must be torn down first to make way for it. Another, with a track to replace the one now buried beneath the Yankees’ infield, has had its opening pushed back to 2011 as well, according to the EDC. Some work has begun on new tennis courts along the Harlem River (about half a mile and one highway overpass away from the old ones), but there’s no sign of activity on the vest-pocket kiddie and skate parks promised for the corner of 157th Street and River Avenue.

Junius Van Sinderen, Ombudsman, asks: So what does the pro-Eminent Domain (pro-Hillary too, natch) New York Times have to say about all this? Pretty much the same as “Brownstone” & “luxury Gowanus” bloggers had to say about Kendel’s (or Helen’s Place on Smith, or Don’s Music on Amity or that old ghetto record store that was on Hoyt) closing: not a single goddamn thing.

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