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a bridge too farCaz Dolowicz remembers: Drunk in Astoria, againhere Mr. Angry at? Drunk in Bayside— oh, Bell Boulevard brogues, ya’ll slay me. Drunk on Corona Light that one time, what crap— I pissed off the Cross Bay Bridge. Drunk in Douglaston— the bartender played Run DMC Raising Hell repeatedly. Drunk in Edgemere— surf’s the fuck up, sweetcheeks. Drunk in Fresh Meadows— “I go to St. John’s Unversity”! Drunk in Jamaica— Ski Mask Way, just off Sutphin. Drunk in Kew Gardens— talking Tudor-era buggery, cool. Drunk in the Lindenwood Diner— yeah, my girlfriend’s a line cook there. Drunk in Maspeth— meet me at O’Neill’s next Monday? Drunk in Neponsit— & naked on the sand dunes, nice ass! Drunk in Ozone Park—I don’t even know how to pronounce Gambino. Drunk in public housing— QB, bitch. Drunk in Queens Borough Hall— a lot of people are. Drunk again in Rockaway— Beach 116th St style. Drunk in Sunnyside— soak it up with papusas, all hail El Salvador! Drunk at Touch, 23-70 Steinway— my boy’s a bouncer there. Drunk at Utopia song of the sirenBagels— even at breakfast. Drunk at Vixen, 6007 Metropolitan— va-va-va-voom! Drunk in Willets Point—motherfuck eminent domain abuse. Drunk ex tempore & eating Guyanese fried chicken on 101st Avenue with my ex-wife—extremely weird but true tales of Richmond Hill cupidity. Drunk at the Young Israel Forest Hills Senior League— shalom! Drunk at the Zen Center in Flushing— Zyczymy Smacznego, how could you?!

Caz Dolowicz was born on Sands Street in 1923. A retired New York City Transit Authority Tower Operator, he lives with his wife & two cats in Baa Baa Bay Ridge. Years ago— well… better ask your mom first.

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